Try Adding Smiles and Humor to Your Travels by “Talking Wrong” Whenever Possible

One of the absolute legends of comedy, Robin Williams once said during a routine: “Whenever you’re around children, talk wrong.” The result would be hilarious when the child went to school and asked for something, like permission to go to the lavatory, and the words would all come out sounding ridiculous.

Clearly, we don’t do this because it would be very cruel and mean to the poor child but it did get me thinking… (oh really, Rene – do tell)!

Traveling for frequent flyers can get old and a bit boring. It’s the same airports and gates, the same planes and announcements, and the same hotels over and over—and not just for you, the traveler, but also for all those you interact with.

So why not mix it up a bit? Like how? Well, next time you fly, try some of, if not most, of these ideas and see if your travels don’t become a bunch more fun.

Let’s start with your rideshare to the airport. As soon as you jump into the car say: “follow that car!” I mean it always seems to work in the movies or any novel I have ever read right? I imagine the look on the driver’s face would be worth the effort.

When you get to the airport you have to pass through TSA. They seem to not have any kind of humor so I really don’t suggest trying any of these but my mind thinks what might be fun to mention like – “Do I need to take my pet tarantula out of my bag before x-ray“? Or maybe something like – “How many solid gold bars can I have in my bag before you need to search it“? Let’s move on.

Once you get past security you are likely off to the airline lounge to either get some work done or relax before your flight. Once you’re settled in another guest may say to you: “Will you watch my stuff while I go to the lavatory“? Here is your next chance for some fun. Your options are:

1) Once they are out of eye shot jump into their chair so when they come back you can tell them, after they give you a perplexed look, that you were “taking your assignment seriously“!

2) Again, once they are out of view, move all their stuff over by one seat and see if they notice.

3) Tell them NO and that you have always wanted one of those laptops and watch them walk away and make sure they see you are watching them walk away!

Now it is time to board your flight. If it is an early AM flight, and the flight attendant says good morning to you, tell them “good evening” or the other way around if an evening flight. Or go crazy holiday and say “Happy Earth Day” and watch the reaction.

After such a unique greeting your next interaction with the flight attendant needs to be taken up a notch. When they ask you if you would like a preflight beverage ask for “a warm glass of goat’s milk” and again enjoy the reaction. Maybe follow that up with a Woodford Reserve would be fine if a goat is not available just now. 🙂

One more fun one if you want to really blow the flight attendants mind. This one takes pre-planning. Go to eBay and buy an old SKY Magazine like this one and slide it in the seat pocket. Then ask the flight attendant for an in-flight magazine and then say: “oh wait, never mind, I see there is one in the seat back” and pull it out and start reading!

OK we have been mean enough to the flight attendants. Often the pilots are not in a mood to be joked with preflight but they often are at the boarding door when you get off. Try to mess with them and make up the wrong city you have arrived in. So if in Atlanta say: “I am so happy we made it to Detroit“!

Now it is time to have some fun with the hotel folks. I, most time, request a King size bed. But when you get to the desk ask: “Is a Princess bed is available?” Or if they allow pets, mention that you are so looking forward to getting to your room so your pet tarantula can stretch his legs (all 8 of them). The latter is a good idea if no Princess bed or upgrade is available for you as an elite.

I am sure there are a ton of more fun things we could say and steps I have left out of your normal travel adventures so if you have more good ideas for us to try to make our travels way more fun please be sure to share them in the comment section below! – René