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If you like travel and drama — especially when it involves families and second marriages — you’re in for a real treat.
Quick Backstory
On the TwoHotTakes subreddit, a guy (we’ll call him “Bob”) details the trip he and his second wife (he calls her “Meg”) took from their home in the Pacific Northwest to visit their daughter (he calls her “Jess.”)
Jess goes to college on the East Coast.
Also very much worth mentioning: Bob’s first wife (Jess’ mother) died from complications during “unfortunately passed away due to complications during Jess’s birth.”
Ugh. That’s so sad.
Bob married Meg when young Jess was six years old.
Meg has a punctuality problem when it comes to traveling. I’ll let Bob explain:
Let me start by saying that traveling with my wife is not a great experience. I am very type a, I like to have everything organized and make sure that we get where we need to be early, especially when traveling. My wife is the opposite, very “go with the flow” and “we will get there when we get there”. I do my best to meet in the middle, but not when traveling by plane.
Say, Bob, is there an example you have from a previous trip?
Last year, during parents weekend Meg and I were going to fly out to see Jess. Our flight was at 10am. Our airport isn’t huge, but not a tiny airport either. I told my wife that we needed to be at the airport 90 minutes early, and we live about 30 minutes for the airports. This being said I wanted to leave at the very latest by 8, since we would also need to park and walk a little bit.
I of course got up at 6, to make sure everything was ready and accounted for. My wife does not like to get up early. It took me attempting to wake her up 5 times before she eventually got up at 740 then wanted to make coffee, shower, and eat a bowl of cereal … let’s just say that we didn’t leave the house until 9. It ended up being busier at the airport than normal (likely due to many colleges having parents weekend) and it took so long to get through security that we missed our flight.
Rightly so, the airline refused to refund our ticket. We were able to get new tickets but not until the next day and missed Friday afternoon and Saturday morning with our daughter. Jess was disappointed to say the least.
That’s nothing compared to where we go next.
She Needed Her Coffee!
Bob says he and Meg flew East to help Jess move. Everything was fine during their first flight. They made it to their plane “with a bit of time to spare, and my wife was annoyed.”
Yes, waiting 45 minutes for a flight is so onerous. What a wretch.
It’s at the major hub where everything turned into a hot mess. Bob said they took multiple trains to their connecting flight. They had only 15 minutes before boarding.
Meg wanted coffee.
No problem! Bob said he’d buy her coffee at the small market next to their gate.
No, no. Meg wanted Starbucks coffee. (This woman is Matthew Klint’s worst nightmare.) But that was a train ride and “a little bit of a walk” to a different terminal.
Bob said no.
Meg said yes.
“She walked away, at a brisk pace for her…” (bold mine)
Amazing. As a native Midwesterner, I rate that passive-aggressive, backhanded compliment a 14/10.
Bob says he waited 15 minutes. No Meg. Then boarding started.
They called a few groups, then called ours. In a panic I called my wife again, 3 times, finally on the last call she answered and said she was on her way, it was a long line and she had to wait a bit. I told her they were almost done with boarding and she needed to hurry up.
The gate agent basically told Bob to get on the plane or he’d have to take a later flight.
He’d been there and done that.
“I tried to plead with (the gate agent) to wait a couple of minutes but she insisted that she couldn’t,” he said. “So, I boarded the plane.”
Meg finally arrives with her triple double frap super foam latte macchiato or whatever.
“…my wife calls me saying the the attendant won’t let her on, they had already removed the boarding ramp at that point. She told me I needed to tell them to let me off the plane to be with her and I said no. It is not fair to do this again to Jess, I said I told you we didn’t have time but you decided to go anyways. I told her to go purchase a new ticket for the next flight and I would see her when she arrives.
CUT TO: Meg shows up at Jess’ school at some point.
Meg “seemed unbothered by the whole situation, didn’t even really talk about it. I thought maybe she realized it was her fault and just wanted to drop it… Boy was I wrong. We are now home and she hasn’t talked to me since the trip, over a week ago, and is insisting that I am an a-hole.”
So, Meg just put on a facade for the trip — including the ride home?
Peanut Butter and Jelly?
Does anyone suspect that maybe Meg is oddly jealous of Jess — the girl she helped raise?
“(Meg) is never one to be late to work or anything like that, or just seems like travel is her poor area,” Bob wrote. “I never noticed things like this until we started traveling often to see our daughter…”
You don’t say?
“My daughter made a comment that Meg doesn’t like want to come to see/help her and that is why she is always running late,” he added, “but I have offered to go alone and Meg was always very against that idea so I wouldn’t think that is the case.”
Well, I think that’s the answer.
What do you make of this situation? How would you react in their shoes
H/T: NYP
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If Meg doesn’t act like this on any other trip except when going to see Jess then the kid is right, and Bob should tell Meg to pack her bags and send her on a one-way trip out of the house. I would.
After my ex-wife and I split and I started dating again, I dumped a few women who weren’t happy with the fact that I was still involved in my step-daughters’ lives. Nobody gets between me and my kids and nobody tells me how to parent them. Nobody. They may be my step-daughters but I raised them for 10 years at that point (and now going on 15 years) and I’m the only dad they have as their biological father flaked out years ago.
Seems like Bob could be convinced that his best move is to “ditch the (w)itch” and stick with the kid. I wouldn’t hesitate.
A husband should never board a plane without his wife, if there is a chance she won’t make it, and vice versa. A husband should never speak badly about his wife in public, or at all for that matter, and vice versa.
He should have deplaned and waited for the next plane. That having been said, if everything said here is completely factual, she should be more thoughtful.
I agree with you to a point because you are articulating respect, but respect is a two-way street. If you go to the original post in Reddit, there seems to be a history of jealousy/disrespect between “Meg” and “Jess”, and that disrespect is spilling over into “Bob” and “Meg’s” relationship.
But to your first point, while no spouse should board a plane without their other spouse, so too should no parent have to forsake their child for their spouse for any reason.
“Meg” is acting childish. “Bob” and “Jess” should not be punished for “Meg’s” petulant behavior. “Meg” needs to grow up.
I wish you were married to someone like Meg and had a daughter on the other side of the country.
If I was that still wouldn’t change the truth of what I said.
Definition of heaven: British house, Chinese cook, American salary, and Japanese wife.
Definition of hell: Japanese house, British cook, Chinese salary, and American wife.
The easy solution to this was not to get involved with a person like that. I never put up with high maintenance women and anyone that isn’t timely is also shown the door. I once went out with this attractive lady but when I mentioned something about travel to see what she would say, she made the mistake of talking about all of the luggage she has to take. After that I called up an ex-gf and we got back together and have stayed together for a long time. I’m sure the other lady didn’t realize what triggered the breakup.
I can’t imagining traveling with her, complete torture.
They sound perfect for each other.
I would have left her also!
I would have done two things (1) As “Bob” did, I would have boarded the plane, and (2) I would definitely reassess this relationship. As an aside – her not talking to him would be a welcomed relief if I was “Bob”, she really has nothing to say in her defense of her “entitled” attitude. My recommendation — get rid of this child and find a “real” woman.
He better have a damn good reason for this or he’s going to be in hell with her for quite a while.
The reason(s) are listed in the post.
I have and will leave anyone ANYWHERE if they are not getting with the program. You can’t wait? Well guess what you are waiting now, trying to figure out what to do and I see you when I see you.
That is soo disrespectful of other peoples time thinking someone is going to wait for you.
I agree with you, except when it’s a family member.